During many years I didn’t know the answer. It could not be so, because I was not prepared for what was to come…
I spend a lot of years wondering dormant, putting me deliberately to sleep, just to be like everyone else.
I did not know what I was carrying in my heart, and the knowing was kept to unfold…
But the day would come, and all my world would crumble down at my feet with no way to turn back.
Should I call that day, the day of no return?
It seems I could, if I wanted to… instead I tried so hard to erase that day from my mind.
Was that the answer to my childhood question, or was that the affirmation of a doomed life?
Cause in many ways and times it was felted like being somehow cursed with no understanding of the reason why it was felted to be like that.
From cursed and doomed I turned to completely crushed… How could that be the truth of my being?
How was I supposed to accept that revelation as real as I being a body of flesh and blood?
How was I supposed to deal with something like that?
I reacted in refusing and neglecting what was been made known…
Many signals have been received letting me know that there would not be a way out from this supposed truth…
Even so, I tried to return to a state so well known for many years of my life. Yep, the dormant state!
But, no more I was able to return to that way of living, or should I call it no living…?
But I tried so hard to return to that numb state of being without being…
Until I come across to the point that was not a valid way to turn back, nor was, to avoid the received knowing.
So the question “Who am I?” have turned into something like: “What am I supposed to do?”
Two years later, after many tries to lose the knowing, I can say:
Forgive what you have done!
Trust in who you are!
No matter who you have been and no matter what is to come, just relay on your inner feelings, knowing that you are not alone, you never were alone but always carefully kept in sight of those caring you from out of vision.
Being so loved and cared as much someone can be, even that you have not noticed…
So now, can you put yourself in God’s hands, knowing that He will not forsake you?
Will you do your best to trust in Him with all your Heart and all your Being, against all that may try to make you refuse His presence within you?
Knowing He is your rescue and your shelter, and always was.
Knowing He give’s you the needed guidance to lead you Home, and He always had.
And it does not matter what it was, but it matters what Is Now!
Cause Now, is all that you can change doing something about it.
So, please, can you at least try to choose to live in trust from Now On!?
By trusting you’ll be living by the heart, and by living by the heart God can only dwell in you.
There will be no void or resignation, but fullness in vivid living presence.
Don’t believe in me?
Try out, and see for yourself! :)
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